Ef You Treyarch...

When Sly and Harrison are….

….the best action movie stars around you know we have a problem. I see this as a bad problem and a problem that is going to nip everybody in the arse.

Like most everybody I would say I’m a general fan of movies.  On a given week I at least watch part of one movie and upwards to five titles. This calendar year I’ve attended the movie theater only three times, and two of those times were for movies I was genuinely excited for (one was a date night to see Run Fat Boy Run that was alright).

For the first half of 2008 the two movies I’ve had any interest in seeing in a movie theater where “Rambo” and “Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull“.  Both of those movies star men in their 60′s.

And both kicked utter ass.

Conversation between my friends always comes back to the subject of the death of action movies. With all these damn comic book and 80′s throw back movies (I GUESS they are action movies and the revisited Batman movies are the only ones I get excited about) and with the conclusion of The Matrix not many action movies of note have been released.  Another conversation piece is who “The Next Big Action” star is going to be? As much as I personally do have a place for “The Rock” and Vin Diesel was badass in Pitch Black they are nothing in comparison to Arnold, Stallone, Willis, and Ford.

What we are seeing more of now are makeshift action stars.  These include some who do it well (Bale, Reeves) and some who I just can’t buy as being action heroes (Downey Jr, Le Boof, Christensen I could goon for awhile here).  What I mean is looking at Jean Claude Van Damme at times he just is a badass, and that is all that needs to be said. Watch this video; 152 seconds of Hard Target classic action. Watching his movies you would never know his father owned a flower shop and he was trained in ballet.

I don’t want accessible action stars.  I don’t want accessible action movies. I don’t want pg-13  tame ass crap all the time.

The movie industry needs to pick it up. This week I urge all to at least rent Rambo on DVD if you are a fan of classic action movies Rambo fits the bill and takes that bill and turret guns it to pieces.  If you are looking for a fun two hour romp into the past check out Indiana Jones.  SUPPORT OUR AGING ACTION STARS THEY MAYBE ALL WE HAVE LEFT!

Category: General


3 Responses

  1. che says:

    Awww… “date night” lol

  2. vanbergs says:

    I have a very hard time agreeing with your labeling of Harrison Ford as an “Action Movie Star”. The Indy movies are more of a ‘Swashbuckling’ kind of sub-genre, with mass appeal across pretty much every age group. The same can be said for the Pirates of the Caribbean franchise, as well as most of the comic book movies. In fact, I’d go so far as to say the Indy franchise is one of the most ‘Accessible’ in the history of modern cinema.

    And that’s fine, for people who like those movies. I admit that I like some of them. Iron Man, the first Pirates, the first two Spideys, and a few others were all a lot of fun. Transformers is another example, of a ‘light-hearted’ action movie, that is insanely well-done. These kinds of films are money-makers, and are easy for most everyone to enjoy.

    The fact is, Action Movies as we (i.e. “men”, or “our group of friends”) have come to know them are pretty much on their collective death bed. I don’t think mainstream audiences really take them seriously any more. I’d argue it’s a by-product of the genre mocking itself. Bad Boys 2 was just outlandish, but at least it was violent… Jackie Chan movies — while brilliantly choreographed — were flooded with humor…I could go on and on. And it’s not that “cool” humor, either. It’s cheeky, silly, “put more young asses in the seats” humor. Even the final U.S. trailers for Rambo promoted it as a mindless blood bath. Seriously, how old and cliche` is “Let the Bodies Hit the Floor”? That fucking movie was pretty deep though, in all honesty. But it would be hard to infer that from the marketing put ahead of its release.

    All in all, it comes down to money. And when you have old franchises being resurrected to resounding success, and comic movies breaking sales records with each consecutive installment, studios aren’t going to gamble on the once tried and true formula of “One man vs. armies/gangs/entire countries”.

    As for the next big action star, nobody wants to step up and carry that torch. In the last decade or so, many have stepped up for the relay — pretty successfully I might add. Jason Statham was absolutely bad ass in Crank, and say what you want about Tom Cruise or Will Smith…but those assholes know [or at least recently knew] how to make a goddamn good action flick.

    Regardless, I love vanlandw and I’m buying Rambo the second I get out of work today.

  3. vanlandw says:

    Vanbergs – You make pretty much the only point to really be made. It’s all about money and the studios are learning how to make big money. PG-13, based on an existing property. To a degree I don’t have too much of a problem with that. Looks like the rated R action movie is turning more into a small budget niche. But keep in mind I’m not only talking about cheesy action movies. Look at the matrix, terminator 2, aliens, and even heat. These are all rated r action movies that are in the top 250 in the IMDB website. These are the type of movies I don’t want to die all with strong casts and big budgets. The thing about Rambo is it didn’t cost shit to make and it’s going to make crap loads of money.


    After DVD sales this one is a large winner for Sly.

    You make a good point about indy. They really are action/adventure and I should have wrote a separate indy posts and I put way to many discussion points into one post. It was mostly when watching indy and and thinking back about watching rambo everybody says they are too old to be doing this shit but watching the movies it doesn’t even mater. Older indy and rambo actually make the movies better in an odd way. I should have made that a separate post. Jason Statham is pretty badass. Will Smith should make Bad Boys 3 abit we are not going to see that.

    This is a endless discussion but yeah we have both made strong points. We are vans.


Leave a Reply